Legacy.

Everyone worries about the future, right?

I mean to say that people don’t know what the future holds, so they tend to stress about times ahead.

 

But what about your legacy?

What you leave behind for the world to see?

What about my legacy?

When I die, what will people make of me?

I want to leave my mark on the world the same as anyone else. I want people to know my name.
But what if I don’t get the chance?
What if the future I’m constantly promised I’ll have is just taken from me?
How will people remember me then?

If I died tomorrow, what would I leave behind?
Would people look at this? This culmination of thoughts and processes in my mind?
Maybe this is my legacy.
I started Enigmatic Thoughts with the idea that nobody would see a word of what I wrote, that I had an open space to spew my thoughts into.
But now a sea of people with their eyes on my mind has led me to censoring some of my worst thoughts out of fear they’d worry.
So will people look back on this? The best and only collection of my ideals, beliefs and concepts? Will people think back to the relatable nature of my writings or will they focus on the darker, shit-filled enigmas that roll around my brain, occasionally making an appearance on the internet?

Will they cry? Mourn and weep over the loss of a good friend?
Or will there just be one less depressing voice in a sea of optimistic ones?

Will they remember me at all? How long before things go back to normal?

Weeks? Days?

Will life go on for you the same way it did with me in it? Will you pretend to care for the sake of others for a few hours, and then move on with your life?

Be realistic – how long before my absence becomes just another thing you deal with subconsciously? A constant, alarming siren that deteriorates into static white noise before fading into your subconscious without you realising.

 

I don’t want to be remembered for my writing.

I’m not even certain I want to be remembered at all.

Maybe it’s better if I just fade out of existence and don’t let people stress over me.